Your Adventure is About to Depart: An Evening at The Mayan
by Fred Worbon [worbon@slugmag.com]
Issue 239 / November 2008 More from this Issue
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The Mayan
9400 South State Street, Sandy, Ut, 84070
Monday – Saturday 11 a.m. – 10 p.m.
Sunday 11 a.m. – 9 p.m.
801.304.4600
Reviewed Oct. 8, 2008.
I was hanging out with a bunch of friends the other day and realized"Christ! My friends have a lot of kids!" It occurred to me that there areprobably a lot of people out there reading SLUG that have kids, and notjust teenagers. I decided to drop by a kid-friendly place to see if it wasworth hitting up the next time the nieces and nephews are over.The Mayan seemed like an obvious first choice––being tucked awayin that breeding ground commonly know as Sandy in that LasVegas casino knock-off strip mall— The Jordan Commons.I had been to this place once before andwas not impressed, but that wasjust shortly after it hadopened, long beforethe lawsuit in Julyof 2000 by CasaBonita, the original cliffdiving and torch jugglingcafeteria-style Mexicanrestaurant in Lakewood,Colo., alleging violationof intellectual propertyrights and The Mayan’ssubsequent remodelingand revamping.
To make sure we could get akid’s perspective, I draggedalong another SLUG staffer,her seven year old daughter, animmature friend and of course, my poorwife who had to keep us all in line.The entry and lobby looked like some poorlybuilt mock up for a ride at Disneyland. It wasnot entirely clear why it was decorated like anarcheological outpost, but I figured that it didn’t matterbecause at least there wasn’t a gift shop. After a 10-minute wait, a mumbled voice announced over a cracklingloudspeaker, "Worbon, party of five, your adventure is about todepart!" We were lead down a hallway to an open dining roomwith walls draped in fake tropical plants, a large manmade cliff with apool at the bottom and speakers playing jungle noises that sounded like one ofthose meditation CDs you see displayed on anew age store’s endcap. We were seated at abooth with a clear view of the cliff.We started with some drinks. My wife ordered aBloody Mary, my buddy a beer and the child gota strawberry banana smoothie. I can’t speak for thesmoothie, but the Bloody Mary tasted pretty bland, kind oflike the bar tender just used tomato juice and vodka. I don’tknow why so many restaurants have such a tough time with theBloody Mary, but it’s not tough to add a little seasoning, maybesome onion powder or garlic or pepper or even just a little hot sauce.It wasn’t a big deal though, because I think we were mostly just happy to havethe option to drink,.I was actually a little surprised that The Mayan had a fullliquor menu as well as beer and wine, and based on the entertainment, I wouldsuggest taking advantage of it
The dinner menu was dividedinto three sections of entrees:Latin, American and Kids,which we were given acomfortable amount oftime to review before ourserver returned. After a briefrundown of the specials, thewaitress took our order and wesettled in with some complimentarychips and salsa and an appetizer ofQueso Especial ($5.95) that tastedlike Cheese Whiz somebody hadfarted on. We watched as teenagersdressed like Tarzan climbed thecliff and occasionally jumped in.It didn’t seem all that impressive,but the seven-year-old at my tablewas entertained. The show was in fullswing when our food arrived––withlive drumming and some girl stompingaround in a headdress.I had ordered two tacos ($9.95) and had mychoice of pork barbacoa, rotisserie chicken, orcarne asada. I chose the steak and the porkand ended up wishing I had just opted out ofeating altogether. The Queso should havebeen warning enough. My tacos were dry,bland and cold. Looking around the table, itseemed like everybody else was in the sameboat as me. The seven-year-old only took acouple of bites of her Bow-tie Pasta and Cheese($4.95) while her mom complained aboutthe cold meat on her skewers of Shrimpand Beef Medallions ($9.25). My wifeonly ate half of her Cheese Enchiladas($7.75) and my buddy managed to be theonly one to finish his burger (the special withbbq sauce and onion rings), but immediatelybegan complaining about not feeling well. Whilethe entertainment seemed to keep the kids in the placeenthralled, I’m pretty sure that the shit I took the next dayprobably tasted more like a decent Latin meal than whatwe had that night. It is obvious that the food is not whatkeeps this place in business—I assume it is its proximity tothe IMAX Theatre that brings people there. There is a lunchmenu too, but it’s not likely that I will be trying it anytime soon.
9400 South State Street, Sandy, Ut, 84070
Monday – Saturday 11 a.m. – 10 p.m.
Sunday 11 a.m. – 9 p.m.
801.304.4600
Reviewed Oct. 8, 2008.
I was hanging out with a bunch of friends the other day and realized"Christ! My friends have a lot of kids!" It occurred to me that there areprobably a lot of people out there reading SLUG that have kids, and notjust teenagers. I decided to drop by a kid-friendly place to see if it wasworth hitting up the next time the nieces and nephews are over.The Mayan seemed like an obvious first choice––being tucked awayin that breeding ground commonly know as Sandy in that LasVegas casino knock-off strip mall— The Jordan Commons.I had been to this place once before andwas not impressed, but that wasjust shortly after it hadopened, long beforethe lawsuit in Julyof 2000 by CasaBonita, the original cliffdiving and torch jugglingcafeteria-style Mexicanrestaurant in Lakewood,Colo., alleging violationof intellectual propertyrights and The Mayan’ssubsequent remodelingand revamping.
To make sure we could get akid’s perspective, I draggedalong another SLUG staffer,her seven year old daughter, animmature friend and of course, my poorwife who had to keep us all in line.The entry and lobby looked like some poorlybuilt mock up for a ride at Disneyland. It wasnot entirely clear why it was decorated like anarcheological outpost, but I figured that it didn’t matterbecause at least there wasn’t a gift shop. After a 10-minute wait, a mumbled voice announced over a cracklingloudspeaker, "Worbon, party of five, your adventure is about todepart!" We were lead down a hallway to an open dining roomwith walls draped in fake tropical plants, a large manmade cliff with apool at the bottom and speakers playing jungle noises that sounded like one ofthose meditation CDs you see displayed on anew age store’s endcap. We were seated at abooth with a clear view of the cliff.We started with some drinks. My wife ordered aBloody Mary, my buddy a beer and the child gota strawberry banana smoothie. I can’t speak for thesmoothie, but the Bloody Mary tasted pretty bland, kind oflike the bar tender just used tomato juice and vodka. I don’tknow why so many restaurants have such a tough time with theBloody Mary, but it’s not tough to add a little seasoning, maybesome onion powder or garlic or pepper or even just a little hot sauce.It wasn’t a big deal though, because I think we were mostly just happy to havethe option to drink,.I was actually a little surprised that The Mayan had a fullliquor menu as well as beer and wine, and based on the entertainment, I wouldsuggest taking advantage of it
The dinner menu was dividedinto three sections of entrees:Latin, American and Kids,which we were given acomfortable amount oftime to review before ourserver returned. After a briefrundown of the specials, thewaitress took our order and wesettled in with some complimentarychips and salsa and an appetizer ofQueso Especial ($5.95) that tastedlike Cheese Whiz somebody hadfarted on. We watched as teenagersdressed like Tarzan climbed thecliff and occasionally jumped in.It didn’t seem all that impressive,but the seven-year-old at my tablewas entertained. The show was in fullswing when our food arrived––withlive drumming and some girl stompingaround in a headdress.I had ordered two tacos ($9.95) and had mychoice of pork barbacoa, rotisserie chicken, orcarne asada. I chose the steak and the porkand ended up wishing I had just opted out ofeating altogether. The Queso should havebeen warning enough. My tacos were dry,bland and cold. Looking around the table, itseemed like everybody else was in the sameboat as me. The seven-year-old only took acouple of bites of her Bow-tie Pasta and Cheese($4.95) while her mom complained aboutthe cold meat on her skewers of Shrimpand Beef Medallions ($9.25). My wifeonly ate half of her Cheese Enchiladas($7.75) and my buddy managed to be theonly one to finish his burger (the special withbbq sauce and onion rings), but immediatelybegan complaining about not feeling well. Whilethe entertainment seemed to keep the kids in the placeenthralled, I’m pretty sure that the shit I took the next dayprobably tasted more like a decent Latin meal than whatwe had that night. It is obvious that the food is not whatkeeps this place in business—I assume it is its proximity tothe IMAX Theatre that brings people there. There is a lunchmenu too, but it’s not likely that I will be trying it anytime soon.
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