Dear Dickheads – January 2009

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Dear Dickheads,
I hate new years resolutions … they are the stupidest thing ever. It’s good to make goals, but why the fuck can’t you set goals for yourself at any other time of the year. Why not set a goal in June or on December 29th, why do people wait until the 1st to make them? According to what I’ve read only 90% of people don’t keep their New Years resolutions. I think it’s just wasted assholes saying things like “This year I’m going to sleep around less,” then a Champaign bottle later … bitch is on her back. Too me making a New Years resolution is like any other stupid made up holiday … just an excuse for fucking idiots to attempt to “do something special.”
Mike Miller

Dear Mike,
Ease up on those drunk bitches— They serve a purpose too! without them, ugly desperate folk wouldn’t get laid. SLUG’s New Years Resolution was to stop dropping the “f-bomb” so much … We’ve already fucked up … and it’s only day two. Commitments are hard … maybe next year.

Dear Dickheads