Local Reviews: Destructinator

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Destructinator
S/T
Self-Released
Street: 10.08
Destructinator = Helloween + (a retarded) Megadeth
The four energetic local youngsters that comprise the moronically- named Destructinator love to bend strings and serve up power metal solos, and, honestly, they’re quite good at it, but they need to banish their inner class clowns and freeze the irony pronto. Lyrics like “Destructinator, he’ll destructinate your face,” and songs about their (I assume) teacher, “Mrs. Wadium,” won’t make them any friends outside of study hall. I’m not saying they should pokerface it like Manowar and slide their skinny asses into fur loincloths, but c’mon, the irony is distancing and insulting. Musically, these guys could really accomplish something if they half tried, but the deliberately amateurish cover artwork and dopey lyrics smell like a wet paper bag full of teenage farts to me.