I can’t believe it’s 2013 and I’m writing about the fact that Alta still won’t allow snowboarders on its slopes. If anyone would have bet me 25 years ago that weed would be completely legal in a few states, gay people could marry and we’d have a two-term black president before Alta would cave in and finally allow snowboarding, I would have most certainly taken that wager. And that’s why I’m not a betting man. Have these people not heard of Shaun White?!? I mean, c’mon you elitist skier fascists, are you really so scared of snowboarders scraping away your precious powder? Or is it your Lycra-panted women that you wish to hoard for your greedy little selves? It’s just a matter of time before you won’t be able to afford to turn away our dollars anymore. We are coming for you, and we are pissed off.

Dylan Thompson – Backside Nosepress – Alf’s Restaurant, Alta