I was raised with four older brothers. As you can imagine, sports were important … to them. I had one brother who was sports obsessed. You know the one: captain of everything. Once at age four, we watched him pole vault himself into impalement. Somehow, the pole missed every vital organ, but at the emergency room as we watched the doctor reach up his new anus and pull tar from his back, I was put off sports (and fisting) forever!