“Love All” is the Beginning and the End: An Interview with Tennis

Whether you’re playing a match with a doubles partner or navigating a relationship, it takes two. The Denver-based duo of Tennis produces a neo-psychedelia and surf-pop fusion that is sure to make one fall in love. The band is made up of a blissful married couple: keyboardist and vocalist Alaina Moore and guitarist Patrick Riley. Starting in 2010, the pair have witnessed the origination and revival of indie sleaze, a pandemic and a recession before they have decided to conclude their time making music. Now, after 15 years and the release of their final album, Face Down In The Garden — their time creating dreamy, audible nostalgia has come to an end. I was lucky enough to chat with the talented Alaina Moore on these changes. In this interview we discuss literary references, past passions and ongoing reflections of memories.

SLUG: How has your life changed from the time you began releasing music to now? What are some things you miss about being at the start of your career?

Moore: Actually, I think part of the reason why we are releasing our first demos in a little mini LP called Neutral Poetry, out on our first day tour May 16, because we were remembering what it was like to make that very first record or to write our very first song, as opposed to the feeling we have now. Now there is a sense of mastery — the ten thousand hours, the huge learning curve over time, trial and error, defining our voices as songwriters. Whereas in those early stages, we didn’t have any of those answers or experiences or guidance for our work, but there was this very joyful, free wheeling, un-self-consciousness. So the first songs that we wrote we miss a lot, we can’t ever get that back. It’s impossible, because the first songs we wrote were truly for the sake of itself. There were no ulterior motives. Our income wasn’t wrapped up into it. Our identity as a creative act wasn’t tied up in it. So it’s just pure, joyful self-expression. We miss that. We don’t have that anymore. It’s not like it’s a bad thing. It’s just that now when we write songs, we’re trying to beat what we’ve done in the past. We’re trying to raise the bar. We’re trying to make something that we wish we could hear, that we haven’t heard yet, which is almost impossible. With all of those filters getting so refined, the songwriting process has become very, very arduous. It’s not like it’s thankless or without any moment of joy — it is, but I wouldn’t be exaggerating if I call[ed] it psychological torture. We’ve lost some of that. 

I think that’s another reason for wanting to end it, because we realize we’ve lost contact with that first version of ourselves and there’s no way to bring that back as long as Tennis is our only income. It’s different when you’re like, “My ability to keep my house is tied to this album.” No matter how much you tell yourself, “This is just creative expression,” there’s inevitable concerns that creep in there and just change things. It’s also had an influence on our marriage. You know, our whole marriage has occurred against the backdrop of the band, and that’s been a really profound shared experience but I’m really curious what our relationship would be like without the band. You know what I mean? Without having our self tied to this thing that represents us in such a sticky way, it felt almost inextricable, like our identity [was] bound to Tennis. A part of us both were starting to wonder what it would feel like to not have that.

SLUG: That totally makes sense. When you take on a creative pursuit as a professional career, it’s that wonderful exploration of how far you can go and how much you can grow within it. I think you definitely can tell when you’ve reached the point of, “Are we gonna be able to have the same originality and excitability that comes with being at the beginning of your career?” But all of those lessons fold into each other and I’m sure that when it’s so integrated in your life and in your relationship, it becomes something at the forefront of your minds and your lives in a really unique way that I’m sure a lot of people will never experience. So that’s really, really special in and of itself. Itt sounds like an incredible thing to have happened. 

Moore: Well, thanks. It’s really nice that I feel like you completely understand. I think a lot of our generation, and younger generations, something that’s more unique to us is that a lot of us are entrepreneurs. We have some kind of creative work that’s usually kind of forward facing because of social media and our work. Or your art gets kind of collapsed into yourself. If you wanted to put it cynically, your brand is yourself. It’s about all these opportunities, but it’s also kind of exploitative of who you are as a person. You have to start asking yourself, “How long do I wanna exploit myself for my own income, as my own boss?” Like, I am the capital, I’m the product, I’m the laborer and I’m the employer, collapsed into one self. There’s no one for me to, as the laborer, to even rebel against. It’s just me exploiting myself. That’s kind of a negative way of putting it, because it doesn’t normally feel that way, but sometimes it does. Then we were just like, “How long do I want those things to be tied to each other? How long do I want to leverage myself as myself for my own income?” And I know the answer is not forever.

SLUG: As your nostalgic, aural and visual inspirations have changed throughout time, what artists and projects most prominently spark your imagination?

Moore: Well, I’m a huge reader, so I read a lot this past year. I read Rachel Cusk — I didn’t finish her trilogy, but I really loved Outline. I read this amazing, crazy book called The Rings of Saturn by W. G. Sebald and it’s a book ostensibly about nothing, but I don’t know why it just impacted me really profoundly. It’s a fake memoir, which is so cool. I thought it was a real memoir while I was reading it and when I was done, I found out the person was fake and all their experiences were fake. I was like, “What the? Oh my God.” I sometimes have little lyrical references to whatever I was reading. In the song “At The Wedding” I have a little reference to Candide. I think that probably my greatest influence is literature. And then next probably film. Honestly, David Lynch is a huge all-time influence for Patrick and I, and we were really sad to have lost him this year. He’s a loss to everyone, to the world; it’s a huge loss. We have very eclectic and varied tastes between Patrick and myself, but Lynch is such a big influence in the sense of ugly beauty, or scary beauty. Beauty with the undercurrent of unease, which we’re very attracted to.

SLUG: I feel like ugly beauty is an underrated motif that’s not used too often, but it’s just so fun. It’s such a fun contrast. I love that, even in everyday wear, if I can try to make my outfit as ugly as possible but still make it look good — like, that’s what you want. 

Moore: Oh my God. That’s my goal in dressing every day. 

SLUG: I’m so glad we’re on the same page about that.

Moore: I know. I’m like, “The uglier, the better.” I think it’s funny when some people are like, “Why does, “fill in the blank,” generation insist on looking ugly?” And it’s because it’s almost a challenge — like, elevating something that’s really jarring or to make an unflattering thing [look] flattering. I’m always trying to do that. 

SLUG: Face Down in the Garden reads to me like an old photo book full of good memories. What memories of yours were represented in the album? 

Moore: Well, a lot of it was a tour retrospective, so a lot of time spent reflecting on our many years on the road. I think we’ve played about a thousand shows at this point, which is just a crazy number. I thought a lot about that. I thought a lot about our marriage unfolding on tour, so I think those were the primary experiences. Tour is like the equal opposite to the studio. It’s so different because the studio is so introspective and private and then the tour is so outward-facing in public and it’s just such a strange juxtaposition to go from one to the other. So when I’m in the studio, I do spend a lot of time thinking about the other.

SLUG: What inspired your band name? Did either of you guys play tennis or is it a pun about love?

Moore: Actually, Patrick did play tennis and I’m the one who named the band. It was a bit tongue in cheek at first. I think if we knew the band was gonna take off, we would have probably thought long and hard about it and landed on something different. I named it because Patrick was an amazing tennis player and he devoted his whole adolescence to being a great tennis player. He thought it was gonna be his ticket into a college for a scholarship. He was [second] in the state for juniors, he was nationally ranked, he was the star of his high school tennis team. I was so blown away learning about this in college later. I had never worked so hard for anything in my whole life as he had worked for [tennis] when he was 16. He just busted his ass trying to make this dream come true, and then he had some really bad luck. He got an injury, he lost a tournament. He lost to an unseeded player from Brazil and it ruined his scholarship chances. He kind of had a mental breakdown and gave up the sport. Once I learned all of that, I felt so touched by it. It felt like a Disney movie, but with the wrong ending. I named the band Tennis as, like, “This will be your tennis.” 

SLUG: I’ve got one last question for you: After 15 years of making music with your husband, what have you learned about collaboration? 

Moore: One, we’ve really practiced to not take criticism personally when we’re critiquing each other over our work. Of course it hurts when your partner’s saying no to your ideas but we’ve always reminded ourselves that it’s because we are protecting the work, and by protecting the work, we protect each other. But the other thing that we told ourselves is that if there was a moment where I’m trying to choose between my idea or my vision for the band or song or whatever, and my husband, I pick my husband (and vice versa). It’s so easy when your ego is wrapped up into it to dig in your heels and prioritize yourself. But sometimes when we were at an impasse, a true impasse, I would just say, “Okay, I choose you over the band,” and he would make those same choices for me. And then lastly we drew up a contract when we were like 23 that very crudely said, “If the band, or anything from the band, gets in between us or threatens our marriage, we will quit the band and prioritize our relationship.” 

We felt like for the first time ever in the last few years, that the stresses of keeping the band going, as the band got bigger, it actually got harder to maintain. Weirdly, as it got more successful, it just got to be more and more work, to the point where there was absolutely no work-life balance. It just was a hundred percent, all the time and we remembered that contract we had written and we felt like we were hitting a moment where the band was starting to displace our marriage in the hierarchy of significance, just to keep it alive. And we felt like that was wrong. So again, there’s nothing wrong with the band. Everything’s going great and same with our marriage. But we aren’t gonna let anything jeopardize that, especially since our earlier conversation about self-exploitation when you are the brand. What does it mean when your marriage is the brand? You have to have a boundary and so I felt like — and Patrick agreed that in this last year writing this album — that we were hitting that boundary and that it felt like we really needed to choose protecting ourselves and our relationship over just making albums forever. 

SLUG: That makes sense. That kind of reminds me, even though it’s a completely different type of creation, of content creators who will have their relationship be the drawing factor of their channel or their profiles. I think if you don’t have those clear boundaries around it, it can be pretty unsustainable. It sounds like you both have kept a strong balance for quite a long time. 15 years is a long time. It’s really respectable to know that you have your priorities in mind throughout all of it and not trying to allow one thing to get in front of the other. The reason why you guys make music together is probably because you both love to make music. And also because you love each other, and that’s really what you want to be at the forefront of everything.

Moore: Absolutely, you’re totally right. We said that to ourselves, too — we were like, “15 years is a really long time.” We are so proud that we’ve been able to keep this ship afloat for so long. We’re very proud of what we’ve done and how far we’ve come, and I can’t wait to just be a wife and Patrick be my husband. I’m so grateful for everything the band has ever given us but, what will it be like to just be married? That’s so crazy. Within the first year we got married, we started the band, and it’s just been nonstop ever since.

Every good finale deserves fanfare. Be sure to listen to Face Down in The Garden and catch the couple’s set on Sunday, May 18 at Kilby Block Party this year.

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