Local Reviews: Junior Bellows

Local Music Reviews

Junior Bellows
Hangin’ With Bubbafresh
Street: 09.09
Junior Bellows = Second Stage to Night Ranger at the County Fair
Ever since The Hold Steady took back the term “bar rock” from the 40 year old denizens of dive bars countrywide trying to score with blond meth-head versions of cougars, I have been struggling to think of a catch-all phrase that describes not only the venue where you are most likely to hear this unbearably bland rock ‘n’ roll, but also the crowd that would pay good money to be assaulted by this incredibly boring version of ZZ Top. Solution: County Fair Rock. But this isn’t the main stage classic rock revival band, this is the yokels-only second stage playing to a crowd of selectively bred Neanderthals who can put up with “funky” bass lines, big dumb riffs, pterodactyl-like screeches coming from the lead singer, and a (shudder) rap-rock song à la Run D.M.C and Aerosmith. I have seen the apocalypse, thy name is Junior Bellows.