Dear Dickheads – September 2010

Dear Dickheads,
I picked up issue #258 while visiting my favorite pizza joint in Ogden during my post birthday, the 3.14 pizza was awesome, so I needed a good read to digest to. I was happy to see that this was a no holds bar, able to print “FUCK” type magazine. Fucking Killer! So I thought, maybe this would be a good place to vent some anger. Maybe I don’t need therapy, I have found my outlet! FUCK! ASS! my keyboard terrets is in full effect! But seriously, How the French Toast do I submit music to be reviewed? I mean I had to eat about 20 dozen cupcakes after reading about the Cupcake Social! So as I was stuffing my face, reading Alexander Ortega’s best fuckin’ ever page about Deavy Metal, I was like, “Yeah” , “The Gods smile upon us” “Dear Dr. Evil, “ “ask a cop” All sweet genius dripping from the teat of a goddess! BUT THEN, ........ THere, in my room, as I turned page after page, looking... past the beer review, past the local CD , I SEE...  CD REVIEWS!!!! no contact info... (frown face) . Please dickheads, give me some contact info , so my friends in bands will get off MY BACK!
Thank you,
Johnny Spastic

Dear Johnny,
Thanks for the support! We’ll make sure that we put more “fucks” than ever in this issue, just for you. We review anything and everything local, so if you’re a local band interested in having your spirit crushed by unpaid music writers who don’t really give a shit about you and your “artistic” endeavors, by all means send us your cd/tape/record at:
SLUG Magazine
351 W. Pierpont Ave. #4B
SLC, UT 84101

Dear Dickheads,
Hey whatsup SLUG my name is Evan Ungar and i’m 15. I was recently in SLC and the surrounding area, backpacking for a few weeks, and I picked up my first copy of SLUG while eating at the Red Iguana ( if you like mexican, this place is killer, check it out ). I absolutely loved it. It was my first real taste of alternative press. I live in Middletown, Pennsylvania. I was wondering if you knew of any zinesters in PA? If you did, could you let me know, so I might be able to pick up some copies, because SLUG is the shit, and I hope that any zines in PA will be just as good. I also want to pitch an idea to you. I was on my flight home, and my buddy and I were reading the SkyMall magazine that they put in the pockets of the seats, and we were laughing at all the useless shit that dumbfucks out there actually buy, when my friend noticed that it said “Please take this copy for free, it will be replaced.”  So an idea hit me: what if you placed a few copies of SLUG in those little airplane pockets whenever you fly?  That way it will help spread your zine around, give you a little publicity, and give the passengers some good shit to read. Another idea that kind of piggybacks on the first one: place a note on the zine that ask people to take it with them, and send an email to SLUG with their name and where they live. Or you can have a place on your website where people can record their name and where they live, and people who have had the zine in their possesion can see where its been, kind of like a geocache. These are some ideas. Then the next time that person flies they can replace the zine so another person can take it. These are just some ideas, hit me up if they sound cool to you. Oh yeah, and tell Mike Brown that he should start a blog.
Fuck you Dickheads,
Evan Ungar

Hey Evan,
Thanks for the kudos. Glad you discovered SLUG Magazine on your trip out west. As far as zines operating out of Pennsylvania, I’m sure there is something. If there isn’t … maybe it’s time for you to start your own zine. I’d suggest checking out websites like,, and to find out more info about zines that might be lurking in your neck of the woods.
The Dickheads at SLUG Mag
P.S. We loved your idea about poaching the seat pockets of airplanes! Stay rad dude!